The calm of a hurricane's eye.

it's been 10 years since I stared to dive into the spiritual world. it's been the same amount of time since I learned about the changes one can apply on the self, the ability to see clearly what makes us tick, what makes us feel and react the way we do, I notice that with meditation I actually found my true self.

for many years now I have drifted from the social ring I used to dominate, I faded away, I figured that people change and sometimes they don't but you do and you simply don't function equally as you used to around them, I believe everyone can identify with this matter.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't lose the spark of life or the buzz of madness or the need to socialize and be a part of society, it's just that I realized that in my youth I really needed social acceptance and when I was left alone to my thought I would go crazy, I would fear my own mind and would do anything possible to not face them, I would run and hide and use any substance available to keep them thoughts and feelings away, the only Way I would be able to even tell you that I love you was when I was totally drunk or stoned out of my mind, and my gosh, was I ever drunk and stoned.

today, not using these substances I find myself alienated in many occasions, most of the time I bring it on myself and find a way to simply walk away from lack of interest or sheer boredom, I learned to value my time and to spend it wisely on the things that make me happy and can bring a positive outcome to myself and hopefully to my close surroundings, I sure do try and I am positive about the fact that most of the people I call my friends thinks I am a little weird, it's ok, I can live with that, there is always love under the table and you can be sure that the next time you look into my eyes you will see something special that took me 10 years to find for myself.

So, I am like the calm of the hurricans's eye, I am ready to take on the world and I will do it gracefully and without a notice, sometimes I am indeed a storm in the making but the past years I learn to shine bright with almost a transparent quality, well, if you see me on stage you will understand the value of incognito atom bomb, like a flower, I am like a ghost, unnoticed till I open up and show you what I am all about....

fade in and fade out...not a moment to lose....

...A letter to a friend with the same name..

... I guess after using so much drugs at the end I just don't need it anymore, and I found out once my brain has opened it's 3rd eye I can't go higher with drugs anymore...it backdraft on me...so I guess my karma with drugs is quite over...sweet.
There where times I was so hooked on it that I didn't see the light, I didn't even knew there was a light..I knew one day will come and it will start to change..i love change, shows me that things are moving, shows me that life can be altered to so many directions in which a special strong soul can move to...makes me stronger just thinking about that..
Recentner oneself is the best ! I do it once or twice a day, I must..there are so many things I wish to accomplish that I would go nuts if I didn't chill myself and check myself before I rack myself, Yo!
I must say that I think you are a very wise soul, not many on earth these days, at least not many that take the time to look behind the mirror and see if the picture works for them, I see great future in those who have their eyes open..i truly do..
As for being a vegi...probebly the smartest thing I did (after stopping drinking alcohol !!!) It made me apprise simple food, it made me learn to cook and see the beautiful world of vegetables and fruits...i never been more healthy in my life..i love cooking ! So much fun...and the energy you get once you cook with love...super power !!! this is the best time of my life...i worked for it, I pray for it and I made it happen, none of this would work if I didn't believe in myself, and believing and communication with god made me have faith and hope even when I was down and drowning ! I'm so in love with life and so aware about death and life after all this nonsense brain fucking, I'm so into eternal energy and hidden magic, true that I feel alienated most of the day but I do feel connected in a real strong vibe to this place and it's souls..i know karma very well...so I take care with my business on earth...i'm going to heaven no matter what !

what's my next project !?? well, working at the tattoo art studio will give me plenty of work..making designs and T shirts, updating the site, networking...i hope it will be the bomb and it will bring good clients and new friends...some cash would be sweet too...
I'm totally fixing my life now, cleaning the soul, the house, my mind and heart...it's this time of year! I'm uploading my movies to my video page and also Youtube simply because I have so many visual projects and they are not on-line..so many people know me from my visual work and all my videos are not on-line ! Not anymore...
Got a gig with my band on the 13, with another wicked band called Noblesse ! They are rocking..we will blow that place away, what a great way to start the year, Rock&Roll baby...
So I'm also will be fixing my Myspace and my bands space..i'm making a DVD promo for my band with wicked clips and funny visuals to send it world wide... I'm going to build some more website for my friends the artists, singers and writers that started to see the potential of having an on-line portfolio, myspace really boosted the need for networking skills and when you have it..it fucking works !!!
I also going to start working with a modeling agency, taking photos and building sites...i need to find models to ask prices so I will know how much a model takes for a photoshop and such..let me know if you know something..
I guess playing gaiter till my fingers bleed and writing new songs will be a new daily thing noq...i also going to stop smoking on the 01, not that I smoke that much (1 cigi per day!)...maybe become celibate for a while..did that for a few years..my god I was so into everything when I was doing that...i want more experience, more knowledge and more chilling life...i'm going to dive back into my stones and the healing process...do more diving into reading all those books that collecting dust on my table, writing a blog so I can get all these nonsense of my back...no more kaka!

I feel like reborning...who's with me?!?

Adida The Fallen Angel...